[lessthanthree]
Gonna start writing sappy, douchey hipster hallmark cards on this typewriter. Gonna make all the money.

Gonna start writing sappy, douchey hipster hallmark cards on this typewriter. Gonna make all the money.

I hate when people get on the bus in their exercise gear. Like why don’t you just fucking run there? Assholes.

This bastard is so loud and finding ribbons for it is more annoying than Resident Evil… but I really enjoy using it.

This bastard is so loud and finding ribbons for it is more annoying than Resident Evil… but I really enjoy using it.

f0xyshy:

If Linkin Park plays in the forest and no one is around to hear it, in the end, does it even matter?

So I work with this Aussie girl and we have this dumb inside joke where we say “brown fo lyfe” because of a dyslexic moment we shared.
Anyway, today she admitted to me that she had never used the word “brown” to describe people before she came to Canada.  I asked her what she would use instead and she said she called them “indians.”  I asked her if she called Persian people Indians too and she told me she had never encountered Persians before coming to Canada.

I think I would really fit in in Australia.  I’m pretty good at being racist and not giving a fuck and drinking.

Customer comes in, gets her usual order (iced venti half sweet skinny vanilla latte), pays with her starbucks card, and FUCKING TIPS US $20.  WTF.  She’s like, “I really appreciate you girls.  You always know my order and I never have cash to tip you.”  Me and my coworker look at each other in shock and awe.  I actually told her not to give us the money, but she insisted.  We thanked her and she went on her way.

DAFUQ, MAN.  Regulars be cray.

I Want A Mocha

Me: Hi what can I get for you?
Customer: I want a mocha.
Me: Cool; hot or cold?
Customer: Cold.  Like a frappuccino, but no syrup.
Me: Okay, well the syrup kind of holds it together so I wouldn’t recommend doing that.  Did you want to do the sugar free base syrup?
Customer: I want a mocha.
Me: Um, so do you want the frappuccino or just an iced mocha.
Customer: No, the regular one.
Me: So the hot one?
Customer: No, the frappuccino.
Me: So did you want me to make it with the sugar free base?
Customer: I want a mocha.
Me: Sure thing.

That bitch got an iced mocha.

Two of my babies told me today that they really enjoyed working with me.

Got some feels right in the heart.

One time I made a really shitty acapella thing with myself because I was bored and hungry.

yourbaristahatesyou:

verysharpteeth:

realfart:

deerdem:

selkiesounds:

bogmoth:

I said “have a nice day!” to this old dude and apparently that’s not fucking good enough because he retrieved his wallet and from like a stack of 30 of these things pulled one out and gave it to me and said something like “I hope you reconsider your choices next time”

holy shit

This is the most self entitled shit i’ve seen all day

what the fUCK

What the actual hell? The check out person says “have a nice day” and your correct response is “you too!” What is so hard about that? Wanker.

If a customer ever handed one of these to me, I would literally rip it up in front of them.

yourbaristahatesyou:

verysharpteeth:

realfart:

deerdem:

selkiesounds:

bogmoth:

I said “have a nice day!” to this old dude and apparently that’s not fucking good enough because he retrieved his wallet and from like a stack of 30 of these things pulled one out and gave it to me and said something like “I hope you reconsider your choices next time”

holy shit

This is the most self entitled shit i’ve seen all day

what the fUCK

What the actual hell? The check out person says “have a nice day” and your correct response is “you too!” What is so hard about that? Wanker.

If a customer ever handed one of these to me, I would literally rip it up in front of them.